10 months ago

Bedtime with Toddlers

I have something in common with my just-turned-4-year old daughter K: We both HATE bedtime. Of course, I hate bedtime only because she hates bedtime and she makes sure that it’s a minimum 3 hour process. She used to stay in bed and sing… siiiiiinnnnngggggg at the top of her lungs. For hours. The girl has stamina. And then I don’t know when it happened but she realized that staying in bed is for suckers so when she feels bored of show-tunes she makes a lap around the house. There’s nothing creepier than seeing her little shadow quickly cross a dark doorway when you’re not expecting it. Or when she S-L-O-W-L-Y creeps up next to my shoulder and just mouth-breathes.  Lately she’s been very bold and will declare her reason for leaving her room. These are real-life examples from the last couple of nights:

Please, I’d love to hear examples from your kids in the comments below! Also, any creative responses to her attempts to thwart the inevitable?

  1. My hair is tickling my nose.
  2. My arm is broken.
  3. BeeBee (her floppy teddy bear) needs a diaper.
  4. I need to go peepee.
  5. I need water.
  6. I have a cough (with lots of hacking for dramatic effect).
  7. It’s too dark.
  8. Is the sun coming up? (11pm)
  9. I’m done with my water.
  10. I need socks.
  11. I didn’t want water; I wanted juice!
  12. My pajamas are touching me.
  13. Remember that time we went to Colorado?
  14. Where’s Bosco? (family dog, who is always outside)
  15. I hear something.
  16. My tummy hurts BAD. We need to pray for me!
  17. Can you make my hair a bun?
  18. I need different socks.
  19. I want to kiss you!
  20. But I don’t know how to do a cartwheel!
  21. Mrs. Marcella says not to share food.
  22. Did you know that Baby Brother grabbed my foot?
  23. My bracelet fell behind the bed (WHY do you have a bracelet in bed??!)
  24. But you never sleeeeeep with me!
  25. My tag is bothering me.
  26. My pants are too long.
  27. But BeeBee needs pajamas.
  28. Remember when we saw fireworks? When I was a baby?
  29. I ate ALL my broccoli!
  30. Remember when I was little and I didn’t know how to ride a bike?
  31. We forgot to go to the zoo!
  32. I don’t want my eyebrows.
  33. I need a new book (WHY do you have a book in bed??!)
  34. I’m hungry.
  35. My pillow is hot.
  36. Twin Brother scratched me today.
  37. Sometimes when I go caca it splashes water on my butt!
  38. Is my birthday tomorrow?
  39. But my nails are LIGHT pink. I wanted them to be DARK pink!
  40. Mommy WATCH! (followed by some little spin or flip)
  41. Mommy LISTEN (usually followed by a whistle or a random new noise she’s discovered she can make)
  42. When it rains you need an umbrella!
  43. We never swam in our pool!
  44. Remember when I was a baby I didn’t like Mickey Boom-Boom? (Disney fireworks)
  45. Is Aunt Jenny coming over?
  46. I don’t like barbecue sauce.
  47. Tomorrow I want to wear my new socks!
  48. Ariel swims in the water! But sometimes she has feet and she climbs on rocks.
  49. You know what Lucas did??? (then stretched her eyes out into horizontal slits toward her ears)
  50. Ok, I’ll make you a deal: You give me a sticker in the morning and I’ll stay in bed tomorrow night.
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